Tears
by Scream4Help
Summary: I was seven when the abuse started. He brought me into his room and sat on the bed. He pulled me to him and pulled down my pants and underwear. After a spanking James pulled me close to him and kissed me.I was afraid of him.Oneshot


Hey guys it's me!

This is a one shot so it's only going to be one chapter unless you want me to make it into a full story.

~Nina~

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight

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**Tears**

BPOV

I spent almost everyday of the summer at the family camp with my cousins. During the other seasons I saw them at least twice a month. I was seven when the abuse started. I had fought with my little, Jackson, brother and made him cry. James, my seventeen year old cousin, had been there for the whole thing. I was deadly afraid of being caught because I hated when Renee yelled at me.

James said he would not tell, but he was going to punish me. He brought me into his room and sat on the bed. He pulled me to him and pulled down my pants and underwear. He bent me over his knee and spanked me. My parents had never hit me before, so I wasn't used to this. After he had made my bottom raw he rubbed it saying that he was sorry that he had to do that, but someone had too teach me my lesson. I could feel the pain for the next few days.

We went back to the camp a few days later. This time we were playing a board game and James told me that I had cheated. He said I had to be punished again. He brought me up to his room again and pulled off my pants and panties. He spanked me just as hard as before, but then stuck his finger into me hard and I pulled away, feeling uncomfortable. He left the room and I followed. Over the next few week James kept accusing me of doing something wrong and the spankings continued, but he didn't stick his finger into me again.

One day after a spanking James pulled me close to him and kissed me. I pulled away, but he said we were family and it was okay for him to kiss me. When I refused to kiss back he called me a cunt and slapped me until I kissed back. After we were done kissing he told me that I couldn't tell anyone about this or they would all know I was a bad girl.

The spanking and kissing sessions continued throughout the summer. The last time I would see him during the summer he brought me up into his room again. I was afraid of him spanking me, but he said he wouldn't if I would take off my clothes.

I did. He kissed me for awhile and held me close. Then he made me sit on his lap and he felt my non existent boobs. He asked me if I wanted a surprise and I shrugged so he told me to close my eyes. He put my hand under something hard and heavy. I opened my eyes. It was the first time I had ever seen a penis.

He started laughing and I put my clothes back on and hurried out of the room. For awhile all we ever did was kiss and he would sometimes feel my boobs. The Christmas when I was eight was the first time it changed.

I had hurt my ankle and all of my family wanted to go on a walk by the frozen lake. James volunteered to stay with me. We were watching TV when he pulled me onto his lap. I could feel him getting hard under me and pulled away. He caught me by my hair and lifted me into the air with it. HE called me a bitch and told me we were going to have sex.

I scrambled away and limped/ran into a bathroom. I closed the door and tried to lock it but he pushed in before I could. I was crying hysterically as he picked me up and removed my clothes. He told me to wait there while he went to get something. I stood there shivering, exposed, and afraid. He came back in and I saw he had condoms in his hand.

I didn't know exactly what they were but I knew what they meant. I started to run again but he caught me and slammed me to the floor. My head bashed against the bath tub and he climbed on top of me. He kissed me and licked my boobs. James stuck his fingers in me but I would not sit still for him to be able to get undressed. He picked me up and carried me into the kitchen.

On the way he grabbed a roll of cord. He sat me in the chair and used the cord to tie me to it. He sat on my lap and kissed me and punched me until I would kiss back. He fingered me until he got aroused again. He said he was going to fuck the hell out of me. He pulled off his pants and boxers. That's when we could hear faintly the sound of my baby cousins playing coming up the road.

He swore and ripped off the cords and told me to get dressed. I limped as fast as I could to get my clothes, and he followed me once he had his back on. When I was done dressing he pushed me into the wall and said if I ever told anyone this he would rape me then kill me. These attacks continued, but we never went farther. I was scared out of my mind all the time, and I blamed myself.

I didn't tell anyone until Seventh Grade. I told my best friends, Alice and Rose, about him but they promised they would never tell. I was so anxious about him finding out I told. I went through half of my thirteenth year without anymore attacks, as I never saw him anymore. Then over the summer we were alone together.

He kissed me and I thought that would be as far as it went. He then undressed me and started feeling my whole body. Then he made me look into his eyes and asked me if I had told anyone. I hesitated for a split second and said I hadn't. The heard the hesitation and started swearing and beating me. Then he violently pulled off my pants and immediately made me give him a hand job to get him hard.

He hit me hard and said he was going to rape me now. I begged and cried. Finally he just forced me onto my knees and stood up. He told me to suck. I just sat there at first. Then he slammed my head into him and asked if I'd rather have sex with him. I opened my mouth and he put it in. I sucked until hot cum rushed out of him and into my mouth. I was about to spit it when growled 'swallow it.' I did and I felt myself almost throw up.

James then pulled away and kicked me onto the floor. He put his foot on my head and pushed down. I was threatened that I had to tell the people I told that I had been lying. He also said that if I told anyone else he would not give me another chance.

A few months later I told him that I did not care if he killed me, if he every touched me again I would tell everyone I knew. Besides the occasionally butt smack he didn't touch me again. It's now been almost a year since that last event. I hate everything he took from me and the way he made me feel for so long. I haven't told my parents or any adult and I probably never will.

I know I shouldn't but I still blame myself for what happened. I cry a lot still and have painful flashbacks and nightmares. I've blocked out most of the things that happened, but when I am doing some random task I will remember something. I just wish I could put this in my past and stop letting it haunt me everyday. I wish I could be normal and not live with this feeling of guilt.


End file.
